Written 10/15:
Right now I’m sitting on my couch, enjoying the company of some wine, television, Sara, and a very skinny kitten.
I found the kitten sitting in our stairwell, freezing cold, and very malnourished. How could I not let it in my apartment and give it some milk? I’m not sure what we’ll do with the poor thing, but for now, at least it’s enjoying some food and warmth. It’s so cuddly, I think because it’s cold.
Although today was chilly, it was sunny and gorgeous. Sara and I took a nice long walk to the Bosna River source, and ate lunch at my favorite restaurant in Ilidza. I was in a great mood when I went to skype with my parents and later with Ross. Sadly, there were a few frustrating “technical difficulties” with the computer I was trying to use, but in the end I was able to talk to Ross using Sara’s laptop—a huge relief. I was very anxious to skype with him, since I’ve been so busy and unable to skype for almost a week.
After my skype date, I decided to make a quick run to the grocery store. As I was leaving the store, a young gypsy girl started following me and talking very insistently. Of course, I had no idea what she was saying, so I tried to just ignore her. I was a little concerned though, because she kept pointing and was obviously not begging for money. Suddenly she ran off. A minute later, she and a young boy came running back, with a grocery bag I had forgotten at the store! I reached in my purse and handed her a mark. I tried to hand a mark to the boy too, and accidentally handed him a two-mark coin. Whoops. The girls had a fit—of course this is so unfair! So I started giving her small coins, and, finally, found another two-mark coin to give her. I think the kids might have made more off me in five minutes than they normally make in a week! (People rarely hand child beggars more a very small amount, maybe .10 or .20 marks) I was rewarded with a huge kiss on the cheek.
Being around very poor children, begging for small amounts of money that are nearly insignificant to most US citizens makes me so upset that I usually try to just look the other way. This is probably the wrong thing to do, but I am intimidated by the problem, and feel unable to help in any significant way. As I watch the coverage of the Occupy Wall Street protests in the US, I am struck by how the economic inequality in the US, as extreme as it is, seems insignificant compared to the inequality I have encountered in Bosnia. As I ride the tram and look out the window, there very young children, no more than 10 years old, who are dodging traffic, trying to wash the windows of cars for small change. Simultaneously, I am passed by dozens of luxury cars: Porsches, Mercedes, Audis. The is no doubt in my mind that it is wrong that some people have so little, while other have so much. I should at least try to do more small things that help other people. More small donations, volunteering, etc. At the same time, I think that sometimes charities, aid organizations, etc, can be presumptive about what people want and need. I want to help other people without imposing Western/American presumptions about how others can improve their quality of life.
I’ve been meaning to write and entry about poverty for a while, as well as one about the Roma/gypsy population here. However, I’ve had trouble processing these subjects enough to feel comfortable writing about them. Tonight I wanted to simply write an account of my day. So, I am surprised that I ended up blogging about my thoughts regarding more serious topics. I hope that I have the energy to continue to think and write about more serious things than my small day-to-day adventures.
Of course, my friends, I’d really love to read about your responses to this entry. What sort of obligation do people have to help those around them? Who is responsible for how unfair the world can be? Is it ever possible for someone to feel like they are doing enough to help others? Of course, these questions cannot be answered, and lead to even more complex philosophical questions about morality and ethics. But maybe they are good things to always keep in the back of one’s mind.
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